Advice for sale! 5 cents a pop

I find that since I have started down this path I have been on a roller coaster of emotions. I am not one of those types who gets offended at baby announcements. I am generally happy for them. As I was reading Busted Plumbing (Which if you want a good read I would diffently go read her blog) talked about things that can offend an infertile. I think it is different for each person. For me there are a few that take me to my sad place. Here are the ones I can think of:

1. “I heard if you lose weight you will get pregnant.” or “ I had a friend who lost weight and she got pregnant maybe that will work for you”

I don’t know about you guys but weight is my Achilles heel. I feel like a soccer punch to my gut when ever I hear this . I mean how would you feel if I said you know those jeans would fit you better if you lost some weight? I could go on and on but I think I have made my point.

2. “ At least you have one.”

If the last one was a soccer punch this one is a hit to the groin. I know how blessed I am to have my baby. I don’t really know how to express how much this affects me. I watch my child play alone, I watch her ask why all her friends have brothers and sisters, I have even seen her had “make believe” brothers and sisters. The idea of a big family will never leave my mind, the idea of my husband being a father again is something I will continue to hold on to. My infertility doesn’t just effect my life but it effects each person in my family in some way. So I might have one but I know that we have more children that are waiting to join our family.

3. “Just relax”

Isn’t this what you use to hear in school when that big test was coming? Will this is just a reminder infertility isn’t as easy as relaxing for a test. Believe me if this was a test I would have Aced it along time ago.

4. DON”T TAKE YOUR BABY BUMP FOR GRANTED

I don’t know why this gets on my nerves but it really does. I know pregnancy is hard I have been there, but sometimes you don’t realize the miracle from within. I think this comes from having taking my 1st and only one for granted. I truly thought I was a fertile and took it at face value. Now I have seen the light. I am super excited for your child to come in to the world except when I hear things like this:

I can’t believe I am pregnant again. Just what I don’t need!


IF I have this baby now sure it will be premature but it will survive (34 weeks pregnant)


One drink or smoke won’t do that much damage.

I wish I could say I was making this up, but people have said these things to me. Children are a blessing. Being pregnant with a child is a blessing. I understand it is uncomfortable. I don’t know maybe I am just crazy. When ever I think of how a pregnant lady should behave I think of my two SILS (One is pregnant and one just had her 2nd) They were and are so happy and even though they were or are uncomfortable there was never a doubt they knew how blessed they were and are. I truly hope that when I am pregnant again I will remember their actions and behave in a like manner.



I think those are the big ones in my book . If you do have a friend who is infertile let me give you some advice how to not offend them.

1. Listen.

Before giving them advice on what they are going through, especially if you have no experience in this field listen. That’s what we infertile’s need most a listening ear.

2. If you choose to give advice.

THINK. (1) Would I like someone to say something like that to me in a trial I am going through? (2) No really how would it sound. (3) If you can’t think of anything just give them a hug (if there not that type then skip this step) tell them you will be there for them and then tell them they are in your prayers.

3. Encourage them.
 Let them know you are on there team. ( I have often wondered if I made team jersey’s who would wear them eagerly.)

4. Be positive with them.
In infertility every small accomplishment is like a victory. My family is so good at this! for example. My last ultra sound showed one normal cyst. That has never happened to me. I always have at least four on one ovary and they need to be watched. When this happened my MIL seemed to be more excited then me and then made me tell my SIL who seemed to be super excited for me and so on and so on. I have never felt so loved. It is so easy to feel alone, but when we are allowed to share the good and the bad it takes some of the burden away and shows us how blessed we are.



Did I miss anything? What would you say is the best advice you have received is?


Qoute of the day:
“ My message to you today, my brothers and sisters, is simply this: the Lord is in control. He knows the end from the beginning. He has given us adequate instruction that, if followed, will see us safely through any crisis. His purposes will be fulfilled, and someday we will understand the eternal reasons for all of these events. Therefore, today we must be careful to not overreact, nor should we be caught up in extreme preparations; but what we must do is keep the commandments of God and never lose hope!”


M. Russell Ballard, “The Joy of Hope Fulfilled,” Ensign, Nov. 1992, 31








Love you all

Tiff

The Fertility Diet

I can’t believe that it is already Thursday!!! It is so crazy how fast time flies. So last night I finished the book The Fertility Diet. It was well to be honest Super Boring and I had to force myself to read it. I am so glad I did though because although the book was dull the info was really good. It basically broke down the nutrition value and how it helps you obtain you goal. He then showed his evidence through the National Nurse’s Study. It was refreshing to know I was doing a lot of things right and scary to know what I was doing wrong. He also includes a lot of good tips for women struggling with PCOS. So here are the most interesting things I have learned.

1. “Trans fats are a powerful deterrent to ovulation an conception”

Now I know we all know that trans fats are bad, but I never thought it would be that bad but it make since. This also makes me a bit sad because I love my Tobacco flavored Cheese its. Would it be distasteful to have a funeral for trans fat by eating it? Ahhh I guess the best answer is to stay away. I also learned that on those funny little nutritional labels that they can say no trans fat if it has fewer then .5 grams in it; so you have to look for key words such as “partially hydrogenated vegetable oil” and “vegetable shortening”. {This must be pretty important for he mention’s to look out for it 4 times in that chapter.}



2. “ The amount of carbohydrates in (a) diet doesn’t affect fertility, but the quality of those carbohydrates does” …… “ …cold breakfast cereals, white rice, and potatoes were linked with a higher of ovulatory infertility.”

NOOOOO!!!!! How sad is this info? All of the above food are staples in my house. What am I going to do? Bring out the black veil for I am in morning over my favorite foods. I guess brown rice isn’t that bad and I don’t like cereal so that’s good, but potatoes? COME ON! I am from Idaho how can I not eat potatoes‘. I just got to keep telling myself I will be happy in the long run.



3. “Among women with …PCOS , this amount of weight loss (7%) can not only restore ovulation and menstruation but can also clear the skin and curb excess facial hair.”

I love this! 7% seems much easier then the lbs that I really need to lose. I literally read this and thought holy cow I am almost there! I then I got the good feeling butterflies in my tummy and the world was good…even if for now it doesn’t include potatoes.




4. “Taking folic acid may also somehow directly stimulate ovulation”

Now they recommend 400mcg of folic acid in a multi vitamin. How exciting is this I knew to take while trying just in case but I never knew that it would help to become pregnant! All I can think is yeah I am doing something right.





So there are some things that I learned. All in all the knowledge that I received was totally worth reading it. I plan to follow it as best I can. I do recommend it to any one who is struggling to have a baby I am hopping that it will help me with my long term goal of being pregnant.



My next book I am planning on reading is The Infertility Cure: The Ancient Chinese Wellness Program for Getting Pregnant and Having Healthy Babies

So I will let you know how it goes. What books have you read that have helped you?



BOOK INFO: The Fertility Diet: Groundbreaking Research Reveals Natural Ways to Boost Ovulation and Improve Your Chances of Getting Pregnant (Hardcover)

~ 

Jorge Chavarro (Author) , Walter Willett (Author), Patrick Skerrett (Author)
You can find this book for a good deal on Amazon I think I found it there for like $6.00.

“Our challenges, including those we create by our own decisions, are part of our test in mortality. Let me assure you that your situation is not beyond the reach of our Savior. Through Him, every struggle can be for our experience and our good (see D&C 122:7). Each temptation we overcome is to strengthen us, not destroy us. The Lord will never allow us to suffer beyond what we can endure (see 1 Corinthians 10:13).”

Robert D. Hales, “Becoming Provident Providers Temporally and Spiritually,” Ensign, May 2009, 7



Tiff

My story

So now you know the facts about infertility I thought I would share my story and how infertility affects me.


I always knew that I wanted a big family. When I was little, even now I have watched as sisters, bond and are so close to one another. Brothers who are truly best friends. I always knew that this is something I wanted for my family. So after I found out I was pregnant with my daughter the joy within my heart was huge. Everything was normal and when she was born so was the best day of my life.  It wasn't until a year and nine months later when I had the first glimpse to what path I would later take. After a routine OBGYN appointment I found out I was pregnant again. I asked to make sure that I was and they told me they tested me twice and I was for sure pregnant. I was so overwhelmed with happiness, I couldn't wait to tell my hubby, the world was good. The OBGYN knew we had been trying for awhile and he seemed happy for us as well. Then a week later after my 2nd blood test I received a call that still haunts me right down to my heart. It was the doctor, the phone call went something like this

Me: Hello

Dr.I forgot to care: Hi Tiffany great news!

Me: yeah!!!

Dr I forgot to care: you're not pregnant

Me: ohh

Dr I forgot to care: It was probably chemical, well call me when you get a positive.

Me: Thanks I guess {then I hung up quickly and had a good cry}

That was my last positive test and the last time I saw that Dr. Although for some reason this story is still a tid bit traumatic for me still, it did give me the courage to seek help.

Three weeks later I went to see the specialist whom will now be named Dr.Strange Man. It was through him that I learned that while I was pregnant with my number1 and only, Dr I forgot to care, gave me some bad advice. He told me to eat and enjoy because this was one of the only times in life where I can; without feeling guilty. That advice led me to 70lb weight gain and PCOS. Through Dr Strange Man I was diagnosed with Endometriosis and PCOS. All though Dr Strange Man didn't help become pregnant he did teach me some very important lessons about me.

1. Be your own advocate. I know everyone knows this; and so do I but I was so far into I need a baby land that I didn't care what I was given or how I was given it. {for more details, you can email me}

2. Ask questions about everything and don't leave until you understand the answer. The great thing about Dr Strange Man was that he allowed me to ask as many questions as I needed. He would also call me back when ever I needed reassurance.

3. It is ok to question any medication that you are prescribed. like one time from a different Dr I was given a prescription for something that may help fertility but also helps Endometriosis grow rapidly. So always know what is going in your mouth.

4. Don't be afraid of taking a break. This statement is hard to think about; but every now and then on this roller coaster you, and your body need a break. Every now then take a chance to regroup and set new goals. This helps in so many different ways. This will also help you be super relaxed for your next cycle.

5. The last one I promise. Go easy on yourself. It is so easy to blame yourself when things go wrong, if I only did this, if I didn't do that. First of all this type of thinking is not only dangerous to yourself confidence but it can also hurt you personally. Take each cycle and learn from it so that you can do better. Each experience has the potential to help you achieve your goals but only if you let it. Women who go through this are strong, but often think themselves as so weak. It is time to change this perception not everyone can go through this, but those who do end up better for it.

Trials are what makes us able to handle the hard while still seeing the good.

 One more thing that I have learned. Surround yourself with people who want you to succeed and be happy. I have people whom when I need that pick me up always some how know when to call. It is an amazing feeling to know that even though they might not understand what I am going through, I can still talk to them about it. They get excited when I do and the always lend their support when something doesn’t go my way.

I no longer see Dr. Strange Man. My hubby lost his job a year ago and that put the end to expensive treatments. My fertility plan now goes as follows become healthy. Right now that is all I need to do. I am also looking in to TCM {Traditional Chinese Medicine}. I hope this has helped you understand a little of what my story is all about.
"Faith is not a theological platitude. It is a fact of life. Faith can become the very wellspring of purposeful living. There is no more compelling motivation to worthwhile endeavor than the knowledge that we are children of God, the Creator of the universe, our all-wise Heavenly Father! God expects us to do something with our lives, and he will give us help when help is sought.”







Gordon B. Hinckley, "With All Thy Getting Get Understanding," Ensign, Aug. 1988, 2

Tiff

niaw:fact and figures + some new clothes

So for today's niaw I wanted to show you the figures. It's scary to know I am one of those numbers, but it is also somewhat comforting to know I am not alone. Everyday someone breaks free of these numbers, and I know there will be a day when I or one of my friend's will.

•  One in six couples worldwide has some type of infertility problem

• Forty percent of infertility cases are linked to men and 40 percent to women. In 20 percent of cases there is a joint problem.
• 
  Fertility decreases as a woman ages and approaches the menopause. Women are generally thought to be at their most fertile between 20 and 25 years old.
• Hormonal disorders, damaged or blocked fallopian tubes and endometriosis, a condition in which tissue that normally lines the uterus is found elsewhere in the body, are common causes of female infertility.
• Low sperm count or poor sperm shape or swimming ability are the major problems in male infertility.
• A normal couple in their mid-20s having regular sex have a one in four chance of conceiving each month. Infertility is defined as the inability of a couple to conceive after a year of trying.

• Europe leads the world in fertility treatments. In 2002 more than 324,000 treatments were reported in 23 European countries, an increase of 12 percent from the previous year. More than half took place in Germany, France and Britain. In the United States 115,000 treatments were performed in 2002

This information comes from: Mail Online Health

 

for the lighter side of my post I finally have my goal outfits picked out and bought! Want to see them? Well ok! The first is my casual outfit.

 It is a pair of American Eagle long shorts{size 14}

 and a  shirt from CKU {size medium}. This outfit cost me a total of  $6.00 

My second outfit is a church outfit

the Khaki Skirt  from Gap {size14}

 and the shirt is from Walmart {size jr's XL}

 This outfit cost me $5.00 dollars. I love how the shirt has a longer back, so no bottoms can be seen.

So what do you think? I know your wondering what my secret is on how I can get these for super cheap. The answer Goodwill dollar day! {I love it!}, I get great deals there! Anyway my plan is to get the next size smaller until I am in my dream size or until I need maternity.. ;). I want to fit inside of these in two weeks and I am so close to being almost there! but I hope my next one month picture update I will be in them. 

What are your goal outfits?

• 
  
  
  Don't judge yourself by what you understand of your potential. Trust in the Lord and what He can do with your dedicated heart and willing mind (see D&C 64:34). Order your life more effectively and eliminate trivia, meaningless detail, and activity. They waste the perishable, fixed, and limited resource of time. Choose to emphasize those matters that have an eternal consequence."Permanent, worthwhile growth is attainable, but not without great effort and the honest application of truth. Worthy accomplishment is founded in integrity. Righteousness is fundamental to happiness and desirable attainment. Righteousness is rooted in a pure heart. And indeed it protects one from contamination and the filth of the world. Righteous love is the supreme motivation for constructive change. The examples of our Father in Heaven and the Savior and Their teachings are the perfect source of motivation and direction for life."
  
  
  
  
  ~ Richard G. Scott, "Making the Right Choices" (CES fireside for young adults, Jan. 13, 2002), 4
  
  
  
  
  

   
   
   
   
  
  
   
  
  

 

 

 

Infertility Week

This week is Infertility Awareness week and as I am writing this post listening to one of my favorite hymns; Where can I turn for peace?. I wanted to share why I started this blog. As I thought what could I write to express the importance it has in my life the tranquility this hymn brings is so wonderful. So I thought I would share my first post again, I still believe everything I wrote when I started this struggle journey.  Which I think is saying a lot. This week I will try and share more of my story and the story of others.

FIRST EVER POST ON THIS BLOG
I am starting this blog based on prayer. Infertility is hard, painful, and emotional. I never thought that I would be one of thousands dealing with this. I never thought it would consume so much of my thoughts. But here we are. This is a journey, it will have a happy ending. You may ask how do I know? Will it is all on faith and trust. I strongly believe that I am the only one who can control how I look at things. Sometimes I think to myself how I wish this was over, I am sure we all do. The only way to get through it is to go through it.



At the beginning I said that this was started through prayer, why? I needed an outlet to get out all the things that consume me. So I can get back into physical, mental and spiritual shape. I don't know about you, but I can no longer bottle this up. The more I shove into this tiny bottle the more I lose myself. I am ready to heal, so that I can be healed.


There are so many lesson that we can learn from each other. We each need a Cheering section. If you are reading this because you to are suffering from longing, then we are uniquely bonded. Let us go through this together as only people who know can. Let us be there for each other. If you are reading this to try and understand, thank you. We need you too.


I will be back soon I hope we all can become friends!


I may not know you, but I want to .

If you are want to learn more about this journey 1 in 8 women will take please click on the following links.
 
http://%20www.resolve.org/infertility101


If you would like to know more about National Infertility Awareness Week check out:
 http:// www.resolve.org/takecharge


If you want to know more about Project IF head over to:
 http://www.stirrup-queens.com/2010/04/bloggers-unite-project-if/
{ I have to give a shout out to Tami over at My Infertile life UNEDITED I tolally coppied the links from her blog}
"When filled with God's love, we can do and see and understand things that we could not otherwise do or see or understand. Filled with His love, we can endure pain, quell fear, forgive freely, avoid contention, renew strength, and bless and help others in ways surprising even to us."




John H. Groberg, "The Power of God's Love," Ensign, Nov. 2004, 11




Tiffany

So you know that no sugar thingy.....

No I haven't fallen off the band wagon or anything like that; it actually just the opposite. I am still kicking strong as ever. I just wanted to give you all an update. I went to the doctor a week ago and not only have I lost 4 more lbs but I had an internal ultra sound. Now every ultrasound that I have been to I have had multiple cyst on both ovaries. So imagine my surprise when the doctor says well I only see one clear cyst!!!! Now my first thought was OK now how many are on the left? but no one total!!!! I totally think that it is the no sugar thingy that is working. 
I might have shed a happy tear here and there but I have already noticed the difference in the clothes I am wearing. I wasn't able to fit into my shorts from two years ago and I was going to throw them away donate then  but then I deiced to try them on. Guess what they fit!!! Holy cow I cannot believe it.
So this is the trend I think that I am going  to keep following.  Next week I am also going to start working out again, I think I burnt myself out so I am going to take it easy and start my yoga again.

So how did your week go?


 “None of us makes it through this life without problems and challenges—and sometimes tragedies and misfortunes. After all, in large part we are here to learn and grow from such events in our lives. We know that there are times when we will suffer, when we will grieve, and when we will be saddened. However, we are told, ‘Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy.’

How might we have joy in our lives, despite all that we may face? Again from the scriptures: ‘Wherefore, be of good cheer, and do not fear, for I the Lord am with you, and will stand by you.’ ”

Thomas S. Monson, “Be of Good Cheer,” Ensign, May 2009, 89

Love
Tiff

Jamie Oliver’s food revolution.

*I posted this on my other blog and wanted to post here as well.
SO I have kinda gotten myself addicted to the show called Jamie Oliver’s food revolution. What I like about it is that it really represents anywhere USA, every walk of life and what we have become. I must admit I have fallen victim to the faster the better method of cooking, I liked my foods with a 30yr shelve life and the I have even ignored the truth of what it is doing to me; which is this I am over weight, infertile, and really physically depleted. Since I have stopped eating sugar I have stopped eating the process foods that I am used to eating. What really got me to change my ways was when Jamie showed how to make chicken nuggets. We are a family who used to eat chicken nuggets a lot. I would be lying if I said it wasn’t a staple in our home. After watching this clip it made me seriously rethink it why? Will I will let you watch and you can tell me if this is something you want you kids to eat.









So now because of this clip I gag at chicken nuggets now. So I now announce my first ever blog carnival Saturday’s are now Food Revolution Saturday! It’s pretty simple every Saturday blog about how you have made a change. It could be about how you have made over a recipe, tricks to getting your kids to eat their veggies, or even one little thing that has made difference. You can even blog about this past weeks show. So how about it are you in?

If you have missed any of the past shows thanks to hulu you can watch them right here!

Episode 1





Episode 2





Episode 3





Episode 4





Let me know if you are joining this carnival so that I can add your blog on my side bar!

So grab a button add your link and start blogging!





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Can you tell?

Well it has been just about a month since I gave up sugar . So can you tell the difference? I have lost at least 8lbs!